“I used to have a small stock taking business. If you owned a bar for example, I’d come in once a month and work out exactly what your sales were compared to what you had in the till, so if anyone was stealing from you, you’d know straight away. If you own a business with more than five staff and large amounts of cash coming in through a till, I’m nearly 100% sure that one of them is stealing from you. I have decades of experience so you can trust what I say!
A clever barman who’s stealing will always cover his tracks. Which brings me to one night, around 20-25 years ago in London, I got a call from a guy at 10pm asking me to do a stock take. You see, managers working for big breweries in the UK had a stock take each month, where a brewer would check the premises to ensure its being managed correctly. The company stock take was in the morning, and this guy needed everything in order. He paid for my taxi down, and I didn’t finish up until around 2am. The results showed that he was £3,000 short for the month! This is back when a pint was only £1. I told him, “Well, you’re a little short.” He obviously knew. “You won’t be able to cover this up by 9 in the morning, where will you get three grand worth of stock?” I asked. He said “Come with me!” and he led me into a cellar with dozens of empty barrels, he just grabbed the hose and began filling them with water, put the caps back on and said to me, “When they’re gone I’ll replace them!” This is just one of many stories! When I used to have to figure out these cases I felt more like a detective than someone counting bottles and goods. I’m thinking of writing a book, some of these stories are a good laugh and quite interesting too!”